Question… Do you let random strangers come up to you or your child, get into your personal space and touch you or your child? No, of course you don’t. Why? Because you don’t know them, because it would be uncomfortable, because it would make you feel nervous, anxious or even scared. Because it’s just plain weird. Well, it’s no different for your dog. Having someone they don’t know approach them and come into their personal space, make direct eye contact, touching them, talking to them etc… makes most dogs uncomfortable.
You may not know this because you are unaware of the myriad of dog body language cues that you don’t know how to read. Such as, just because a dog is wagging it’s tail doesn’t mean it’s happy.
Dogs wag their tails for many reasons, even right before they attack. There are many very subtle body cues that dogs give off when they are uncomfortable. Some thing as simple as turning their head away, or looking away, or yawning or licking their lips are just a few of the cues they display. With repeated exposure to strangers your dog can become reactive (growling, barking, lunging, biting etc).
But you can learn to advocate for your dog. Advocating simply means protecting your dog. When you advocate for your dog, you strengthen the bond of trust and help your dog to feel its safest and secure. And when you are around strangers, whether in your home or out in public, that can be as simple as not allowing people to interact with your dog. You may ask, “But what about the dog that is excited and looks happy and pulls towards other people they don’t know?” That dog can become reactive as well out of a overarousal and excitement.
Remember, it’s your dog! No one has the right to invade your personal space, ever. If you feel awkward saying no, here are some pleasant and polite ways you can respond when someone asks,
“CAN I PET YOUR DOG?”
“No, he’s in training, but thank you!”
“No thanks, he isn’t friendly.”
“No, he needs his space right now.”
“No, my dog wouldn’t be comfortable with that.”
“No, we are working on ignoring people today.”
“No, not today, but thank you!”
Remember, you wouldn’t let strangers approach your child, let alone touch them! Speak up and advocate/protect your dog from entitled, albeit well meaning strangers. It very well may save your dog from going down the road of reactivity.
